Throughout Lent, I’ve been following along with Hallow’s Pray 40 challenge for Lent. Over the course of 40 days on Hallow, the guides leading the prayer challenge are walking through The Brothers Karamazov and drawing parallels to the parable of the prodigal son.
The Brothers Karamazov is a Russian murder mystery novel published in the late 19th century. I won’t pretend to have read it, but the gist of what I’ve gathered listening to parts of it on Hallow is that the author, Fyodor Dostoevsky, explores themes of faith, moral responsibility, free will, and the existence of God. The characters in the novel seem to all represent a different aspect of humanity:
Dmitri is impulsive and sensual. We could say Dmitri represents “passion.”
Ivan is a rationalist and nihilist, representing humanity's “intellect.”
Alyosha is an idealistic young monk representing “spirituality.”
At the same time, the guides have been walking through the parable of the prodigal son from the Gospel according to Luke:
And Jesus said, “There was a man who had two sons; and the younger of them said to his father, ‘Father, give me the share of property that falls to me.’ And he divided his living between them. Not many days later, the younger son gathered all he had and took his journey into a far country, and there he squandered his property in loose living. And when he had spent everything, a great famine arose in that country, and he began to be in want. So he went and joined himself to one of the citizens of that country, who sent him into his fields to feed swine. And he would gladly have fed on the pods that the swine ate; and no one gave him anything.
But when he came to himself he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have bread enough and to spare, but I perish here with hunger! I will arise and go to my father, and I will say to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you; I am no longer worthy to be called your son; treat me as one of your hired servants.”’
And he arose and came to his father. But while he was yet at a distance, his father saw him and had compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him. And the son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you; I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’ But the father said to his servants, ‘Bring quickly the best robe, and put it on him; and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet; and bring the fatted calf and kill it, and let us eat and make merry; for this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found.’ And they began to make merry.
“Now his elder son was in the field; and as he came and drew near to the house, he heard music and dancing. And he called one of the servants and asked what this meant. And he said to him, ‘Your brother has come, and your father has killed the fatted calf, because he has received him safe and sound.’ But he was angry and refused to go in. His father came out and entreated him, but he answered his father, ‘Lo, these many years I have served you, and I never disobeyed your command; yet you never gave me a kid, that I might make merry with my friends. But when this son of yours came, who has devoured your living with harlots, you killed for him the fatted calf!’
And he said to him, ‘Son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours. It was fitting to make merry and be glad, for this your brother was dead, and is alive; he was lost, and is found.’”
On Wednesday, Sister Miriam James Heidland led listeners through a prayer session about being the father in the parable of the prodigal son. We can imagine ourselves as any of the characters in the parable.
We are the younger son when we run from our responsibility. We seek things of this world even though it leads to nothing. We fail to hit the target, even when we try repeatedly. We pray that the merciful Father takes us back into his loving embrace, and He does.
We are the elder son, thinking our works on this Earth mean more than they do. We neglect to ask for what we need, and then are frustrated when we don’t get it. We are spiteful when someone else gets something we think we deserve.
And, yes, we are the father too. When we show mercy to others. When we are obedient in the little things. When we forgive others quickly. When we wait patiently for an outcome on the horizon, refusing to let disappointment harden our hearts.
On Wednesday, in particular, Sr. Miriam guided listeners on a journey to step into the father’s shoes. The father encapsulates love, mercy, obedience, and patience. Two things in particular stood out to me as she spoke:
Being obedient is about doing “the” thing.
Waiting is active.
Being obedient
I’m about halfway through Fr. Mike Schmitz’s book, Unshakeable: Building a Life of Virtue in a World of Chaos (which is fantastic, btw), and in it he talks about the virtue of obedience. He talks about how he’s not just any type of procrastinator, but he’s a strategic procrastinator—i.e., Fr. Mike will procrastinate by doing everything else except the thing that he’s supposed to do. I can relate.
He goes on to discuss the difference between essential and supplemental things. To be obedient, you need to focus on the essential things. As an example of this distinction, he writes, “When it comes down to stopping a habit of gossip, bitterness, or impatience, or putting a sticker on my bumper, it is far easier to put a sticker on.” Changing yourself on the inside is essential, but it’s easy to mask it with external signs or to point at external factors as “reasons” for not being able to change.
Actively waiting
Patience is a virtue. Like all virtues, it must be practiced. Sr. Miriam describes the father in the parable looking out from his porch, his eyes endlessly scanning the horizon for his youngest son.
Though the father is waiting, he is not doing nothing. He is, as she puts it, “remaining open when it would be easier to close off… loving without guarantees… hoping without timelines.”
How often do I stew over hypothetical situations that may never come to pass? Way more often than I’d like to admit. This was a good reminder for me to surrender the outcome of so much in my life to God. I can and should only focus on my circle of influence. That is the obedient thing to do, after all. And the outcome? Well, as much as I can try, as much as I can ask for a specific result, that’s in God’s hands.
Sr. Miriam concludes with this prayer, and so will I:
Lord, make my heart like yours.
📚 What I’m Consuming
I’ve written about these two books above, so I thought it a good idea to link them here as well:
I’m rereading 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey (mostly for the first 3 habits).
Fr. Mike Schmitz’s book, Unshakeable: Building a Life of Virtue in a World of Chaos.
How to do annual planning for an engineering organization (article) provides a great breakdown for strategic planning.
Becoming an engineering manager can make you better at life and relationships (article) and the simple guidebook to upping your management game (article) are both great reads. The former is more about what you learn when you become a manager, and the latter is more about what you should focus on as a manager to be a force multiplier.
Architects & tech leads (article) was a reaffirming article to me about where my focus should be as an architect.
How to get good at giving feedback (article) provides a super-simple framework for giving feedback that I’m going to try to implement.
Peace be with you,
Jacob
psst… hey, could you forward this to someone you think would find it valuable? I’d greatly appreciate it!